Do you have a toxic relationship with your hair? Are you bullying your hair to be something it’s not? I sure did and now I am in love with kink!
Here’s how to determine whether your hair is suffering from its toxic relationship with YOU. The go-natural movement has many of us questioning our natural curl patterns and whether being nappy truly makes us happy.
We’ve transitioned out of relaxers and quickly discovered that our natural kink – even with expensive moisturizers, frizz tamers, and softeners – looks nothing like Moana’s. In fact, your hair might feel course, look course, and resists styling.
Confusing lack of shine with thirst, we weigh our hair down with products that dehydrate our kinky curls, alter our curl patterns, and suffocate our hair follicles.
How do we stop this vicious cycle that can quickly leave us buying expensive hair products with money that could plump our savings accounts?
Embrace
your hair natural kink. This is the curl pattern that your hair has without any manipulation. Whether your hair is thin and nappy or thick and nappy, understand that it’s nappy and healthy nappy hair is strong!
Moisturize
Proper moisturizing routines allow you to enjoy your hair. When you hair has adequate moisture, you can play with your kink’s versatility without sacrificing strength and length.
In its natural state, your hair should be moisturized first with water and second with oil while wet. If you run out of your favorite oil, grab the EVOO or the coconut oil from the kitchen.
Your kinks will thank you with a soft sheen throughout the day. For added moisturize throughout the day – especially in sunnier climates – mix water and a teaspoon of oil in a to-go bottle. Spritz whenever you want. Never comb or brush dried hair.
Once your coiffed hair is dry, let it live! To style again, first saturate you hair with nature’s number one thirst quencher: WATER. If you have more than five cleaning and moisturizing products in your weekly routine, you are probably causing damage to your hair.
Moisturizing Hair Essentials: water, co-wash, conditioner, leave-in conditioner, and oil.
Hair Tools: a wide toothed comb and wide toothed brush. Did you know that a firm paddle brush detangles and defines curls? Use while hair is saturated with water. Add your favorite leave-in conditioner and oil moisturizer, then brush thoroughly in sections from tip to root.
Watch your natural curls pop. Allow to air dry or, if in a rush, use a diffuser. It’s set! Forget it.
Set It and forget it. Once you are coiffed and off to handle the day’s business, let your hair be. Too many products will weigh it down and even cause breakage.
Adding expensive moisturizers to dry coils does nothing except make your hair look and feel greasy while remaining dehydrated. Efforts to manipulate dried hair create a toxic relationship and your hair will eventually give up the fight.
You are beautifully and wonderfully made as is your hair. Not sure if you have a toxic relationship with your kink?
Take the Quiz Below
1. How many products do you use weekly to moisturize you hair?
A) 1-3 or more
B) 4-6
C) 7 or more
2. How many times per week do you use a commercial curl-defining product?
A) 0
B) 1-3
C) 4 or more
3. How many times per week do you use edge-controlling products?
A) 0
B) 1-3
C) 4 or more
4. How many times per month do you use keratin-enriched products
A) 0
B) 1-3
C) 4 or more
5. On average, what does your morning hair routine feel like?
A) Yaaas honey!
B) What now?
C) Where’s that scarf?
For each A, give yourself one point.
For each B give yourself two points.
For each C give yourself 3 points.
Add up the total points and see where you fall in the following chart.
(5 points)
Hey, Queen! You rock that kink! You have a healthy relationship with your hair. You’re letting that natural kink shimmer and looking good doing it. Whether short or long, your sheen is poppin’ and your strands are strong. You know your kink, own your kink, and love your kink!
(6-10 points)
Your relationship with your hair is semi-toxic and your hair is getting sick of you! You might have that cute style weekly but workdays are considerably difficult. On average, you wake up wondering, what now and add as many products as necessary to get the look.
Not your look but the look you seek. Try focusing on enjoying your hair as it is as well as keeping it moisturized. Resist the urge to purchase products that profess to elongate or straighten curls. All you need is water, a nut oil, and a good brush to do that.
(11-15 points)
TOXIC
You’re a hair narcissist! Your strands and scalp are sick and tired of your manipulation and they’re likely fighting back.
You’re probably experiencing bouts of breakage and persistent dehydration. You might be causing as much damage to your scalp, hair follicle, and hair shaft as relaxing and texturizing procedures.
Go through your supplies. Throw away all unnecessary products. Reconsider why you “went natural,” what it means to you today, and live in your truth.
Whether you rock the natural kink, texturized wave, or the straight relaxer, you are everything you need to be.
Are You Ready to Have a Better Relationship with Your Hair?
It’s time to fully embrace your hair. If you have any tips on how you’ve come to love and appreciate your natural curls, share them in the comments below.